So our friend Josh from San Francisco asked us “How do I stop being a friend to this one girl I like and have her want me in a sexual way?
Josh, you may not be alone here. Many nice guys usually have this problem. Now, don’t get me wrong, it’s ok to be a nice guy but not that nice! For example, what I’ve learned from dating so much is that when you go out on a date with a girl and you don’t try anything physical within the second date, consider yourself being in the Friend Zone. Women love confident men that will take control. However, now that you are in the friend zone and need to get out, follow these rules and maybe become her boyfriend.
Speak Out
So, you have been there for her every time she needs you and she now thinks she can always count on you to listen to her and be her shoulder to cry on. Well you will need to stop that and can’t always be there for her. We understand you like her and that is why you do it but you need to stop playing that role. So instead of being her male friend you need to speak out and let her know about your feelings. The worst she can say is she doesn’t feel the same.
Disappearing Act
You are always there for her and stuck in this friend zone, therefore, you need to pull a disappearing act. Take a break from her and avoid her a bit. You also need to appear mysterious and not reveal so much. Try to avoid her as much as possible and this will make her miss you and appreciate you.
Keep on Dating
Don’t stop dating women just because you are really into this girl. Try and set up a bunch of dates or act as if you are dating a ton of women at the same time. This will make your female friend look at you in a different way. Women like knowing they also have a challenge when it comes to dating men. Plus making her a bit jealous helps.
Act Naughty
Stop being so nice and put some sexual innuendos in your vocabulary. Make sure to compliment her but don’t overdue it. Actually you can compliment her and then point out something wrong w/ her. This will make her feel a bit insecure and can be a way of subduing her. Also, next time you both are together chatting across from one another, touch her hand casually or while walking next to her, hold her hand to cross the street. This will slowly develop a physical bond with you. Remember a little flirting also helps a lot and breaks up the friend zone.
Be Honest
Ok, so you have tried everything I mentioned above. Now it’s time to bring in the honesty. Take her out to dinner and convey your emotions in a straight-forward manner. You can tell her how you really don’t want to date anyone else. She will appreciate your honesty and this will earn you some brownie points. This time no more beating around the bush. Now she may feel the same or she may not but at least you have taken a chance and can still remain friends.
These are just a few points to get you out of the friend zone. Even if it doesn’t work at least you know you did something about it instead of just sitting there twirling your thumbs waiting for some other guy to come sweep her off her feet.
Everyone, Please send all your questions to: comments {at) pinstripeonline.com
Make sure to include your name and where you are from.
Thanks Dr. Evan Doess
Pinstripe Magazine Staff
Online Men’s Lifestyle Magazine on Gear, Grooming, Girls, Gadgets