You parted with your girlfriend some time ago, and dust already has settled. You understand that things didn’t work out between 2 of you, and there are lots of reashat was great! You hit it off like a house on fire. And when you see each other, it’s so tempting to rekindle the bond! So hard to refuse! But do you really have to refuse? Maybe having sex with your ex-girlfriend is not that bad?
Psychologists say that there can be advantages of hooking up with your ex. But, undoubtedly, there are reasons to stay away. And before jumping into sex with an ex, you must be aware of them.
So, in this post, we’ll find out the pros and cons of such a reunion. And if you decide to take the leap of faith, get to know what to do and what is better to avoid. Here is a guide for you!
Advantages Of Having Sex With Your Ex
- You haven’t had other partners since you broke up. Having regular sex is, first of all, healthy. Nobody can perform well if he/she is, for example, hungry, the same goes for sex. Sports experts admit that those who have regular sex achieve better results in sport – this has to do with hormones.
So, getting a good friends-with-benefits may be an ideal option for some time, just don’t involve emotions and be honest with your ex!
- You know her really well, even how to use her countertop ice machine. And undoubtedly, that’s important for good sex! You both know the ins and outs of each other; no wonder you’ll get what you want without over hand guiding and awkwardness.
- It’s fun and thrilling. Some time has passed, and you don’t hate her anymore. You remember all the sweet moments and, of course, mind-blowing sex! You both realize that you won’t make a couple, but why not have a lark? It’s so exciting and with no strings attached!
Disadvantages Of Sleeping With An Ex
- Emotional aspect. Are you sure that after this reunion, you won’t feel frustrated, vulnerable, or whatsoever? What if you are not ready for such a friendship? Be honest with yourself! Otherwise, you’ll have to go through the second break up!
- Sex with your ex may prevent you from new relationships. You won’t have the time or desire to start something new. Plus, you may feel rather comfortable when you have sex but have no responsibilities. It’s the way to nowhere.
- Your ex-girlfriend hasn’t changed. Again, be honest with yourself! Do you really want just pure sex? Or you want to try to get her back? Maybe your relations will change? No! Delete these illusions! Think twice before jumping into it if you have even the slightest affection!
Now, when you know the pros and cons in sex with an ex and decide for yourself to do it, you must get to know some rules to make this experience enjoyable and unforgettable for both of you!
So, here is a list of tips on what you should and shouldn’t do if the answer to the question “Should I have sex with an ex?” is “Oh, YES!”
THINGS YOU MUST DO
Remind Yourself Why You Have Parted
It’s crucial! If you don’t want to get caught up in the relationship with your ex-girlfriend again, remind yourself of the reasons why you have broken up. Take time, don’t just jump into this game.
Clear Up Your Expectations
The very first thing that you must clear up with her is the expectations and goals – yours and hers. Do not hesitate or fear to spoil the moment or whatsoever! Keep it real for her and yourself – it’s all about sex and nothing more. You can say something like, “We don’t really match up, but you are so attractive, and I remember those mind-blowing things with you. We could share that part of our relations, it would be great! Just good time and no responsibilities!” It doesn’t sound rude; you make her know your intentions and don’t give any illusions. If she agrees – great! But if she expects something more – shut down!
Safety First
When you were together, you probably didn’t use condoms. But if you are going to sleep with your ex, wearing it is obligatory! She probably hooked up with somebody, do not risk!
You shouldn’t feel embarrassed because you are not going to hurt her feelings or ego. Now you are not together and know nothing about the personal life and health conditions of each other. And not to forget about the possibility of a pregnancy! Actually, your ex must be interested in safe sex too. So, if she feels offended, it’s better not to continue!
THINKS YOU MUST AVOID
Do Not Use Old Patterns Of Communication
It’s just sex, even if it’s mind-blowing! So don’t start communication as you did it before breaking up. Do not call each other or text. You and your ex-girlfriend must be very accurate and watchful if you don’t want to make mistakes. It is just nostalgic sex, nothing more!
In case you both have decided to be friends-with-benefits, call, or text each other just to make an appointment.
You both must understand that everything may become too difficult if you start communicating closely. Do you really need it? Or maybe you want to start dating and try to get back together again? Then, ok, you are good to go!
Talk About Girls You’ve Been With After You’d Broken Up
To speak the truth, it’s a great temptation to tell your ex how wanted you are! We all have been there! But don’t do that! Why? Because nobody is interested! You are both here to have good sex, not to boast your multiple partners.
Do Not Discuss Things From The Past
Imagine you were cozy between the sheets, and everything was so fine. She is so sweet and friendly. You want to relax and talk to her, remember good moments. Well, it’s better not to do it. You and your ex could feel great nostalgia for past relationships. Who knows how it will end up?
Never and ever discuss things from your common past that can hurt or upset her! You are here not to sort things out! In case she begins such a conversation, cut it off gently, say that you don’t want to go there again.
Stay neutral – talk about general things, but not your past relationships. Otherwise, you both may end up arguing and yelling at each other.
Treat It Like A Hookup That Will Never Happen Again
If you haven’t planned that and it happened, let’s say, after several glasses of wine at the party, admit that it was great and fun, but that’s it! You have to let her know this very gentle but firm. Besides, she may feel as embarrassed and confused as you do! Make the situation clear for both of you!
Don’t Hesitate To Get Back Together If It Really Works
We were talking here about Do’s and Don’ts for not being caught up in old relationships but still have sex with your ex. However, what if things are more complicated, and you have understood that you really want to renew relationships?
Well, if love is still there, talk it out and sort it out with your ex! Why not try again if you both feel so? Maybe last time you overreacted? Give a chance if you do love her!
Bottom Line
To sum up, the main thought of everything we were talking about – you must be honest with yourself and your ex-girlfriend! Do not allow the situation in which you say, “I regret I had sex with my ex.” It’s sad. Your self-esteem and sense of dignity will suffer if either you or your ex is hurt because of your hookup. It happens in case you don’t talk about your expectations and goals.
You must think about the situation over very seriously. On the one hand, sex with your ex may be fun and enjoyable. On the other hand, you may find yourself broke n-hearted again and the common men’s sexual problems might come to you.
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