Functional clothes are not hard to find. Most of the time their main function is to cover your body (although there are certainly some that fail miserably in that arena, more due to user error than anything else – oh, fashion police, why can’t you stop the reckless display of thongs and boxer shorts?). And there are tons of clothing options for people who need specialized sport- or work-wear (from hiking, biking, running, and swimming outfits to power suits, coveralls, and service uniforms). But sometimes it can be a trick to find clothing that not only fits your needs, but won’t send your girlfriend into a shame-spiral just from being seen with you. So here are a few items that can be both functional and fashionable clothing styles that won’t break your bank account.
1. Zip-away pants. These are not new, but they are pretty cool (especially when you remove the lower half of the legs to turn them into shorts). They generally look like cargo or hip-hop pants and come in a variety of colors and fabrics. They’re great for camping or a day at the theme park with lots of pockets and they give you the ability to go from cold weather to hot (and back to cold again).
2. Bottle-opener flip-flops. For the long, sunny days of summer, it doesn’t get much more functional than flip-flops. Whether you’re heading for a day at the beach, a walk in the park, or even if you’re just catching some rays poolside, sandals are the easy, breezy way to protect your soles. And with tons of surf companies churning out cool kicks, you’re bound to find some that fit your particular style. However, you can’t go wrong by finding a pair with a built-in opener for your Budweiser. Surf-brand Reef offers some with a sporty style and bright colors (as well as more understated leather), so you can look cool while you impress the ladies by slipping off your shoe to pop the top on their cold one.
3. Mosquito-repellent clothing. The Insect Shield brand offers a line of clothing that caters to those who will soon be traveling to malaria zones. A natural insect repellent, permethrin (which is found in plants) is woven into the fabric and it will repel mosquitoes up to several inches away. And with long and short options in both shirts and pants, you can cover as much or as little as you want (just remember that uncovered areas may not be protected). Polo shirts, basic tees, slacks, shorts, hats, and socks round out their roster and all appear generically wearable so you won’t look like the goof in the bee bonnet while you stave off bug bites.
4. Kevlar riding gear. When you pull on the form-fitting jackets, pants, and gloves to go riding, no one will mistake you for anything but a hog enthusiast. However, these are the coolest protective garments since the biker jacket…in every sense. They are lighter-weight than leather, so you stay a bit cooler in the summer sun, but their Kevlar plates provide just as much (if not more) protection from road rash and collision. Available in several color and style options, you can pick the ones you like best and enjoy your ride knowing you look the part (while remaining safe).
5. Water-repellent jeans. If you’re the type to spill food, ink, and everything else onto your pants, you might want to check out the Fire Hose jeans sold by Duluth Trading Co. Not only will they stop wetness from permeating your pants, they’re also stain-resistant and sport five pockets for great utility (they also have 6-pocket cargo shorts). They are practical, durable, good looking, and according to reviews, very comfortable. Sounds like the perfect pair of jeans.
by Tony Benson: If you’re looking to create your own custom clothing, take a look at the selection T Shirt Printing has to offer.
Pinstripe Magazine Staff
Online Men’s Lifestyle Magazine on Gear, Grooming, Girls, Gadgets
